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A crying baby is not an uncommon noise in certain environments, including restaurants.
In a recent Reddit post shared to the popular “Am I The A**hole?” subreddit, one woman talked about a situation where she was eating out with two of her close friends, one named Ann, who is currently pregnant, and Kim, who is attempting to get pregnant.
The Reddit poster explained that, despite not wanting children herself, she tends to listen to most of her friends’ pregnancy stories and talk about being parents often enough to develop a “tolerance” for it.
According to the woman, Ann and Kim only wanted to talk about pregnancies and childbirth during the dinner and so she let them, after failed attempts to change the topic. During this point, a baby began to cry in the restaurant.
“It didn’t seem hurt in any way, it seemed to be a normal cry for a baby,” the post explained. “I noticed it started crying because it was loud and then didn’t notice it anymore. I know it was crying because that’s what my friends kept talking about but I tuned it out and went back to savouring my dessert. The crying was like background noise to me.”
Her friends noticed her sitting and eating her dessert while the two of them were having a “physical reaction” to the crying and began talking about how sad they were because of it.
She explained that she couldn’t hear the baby crying anymore, and in response was asked if she had a “hearing issue” – to which she said that she drowned out the sound, which only upset her friends.
“Both of them looked at me in horror and pity. Kim told me that it is good I don’t plan on having children because I’m heartless and that my baby would be unlucky to be my baby. Ann said that she pities me that I’ll never know the feeling that they both had,” the post continued.
After assuming their comments were a joke, she began to laugh, which resulted in her friends becoming more upset, noting that it wasn’t something to laugh about.
According to the woman, none of the comments had bothered her until she posted about it, at which point many people responded calling Ann and Kim “bad friends”.
However, Kim then texted her to let her know that she should “show more concern” for crying children if she wants to spend any time with her future children. “When I asked her if my heart should ache every time a strange child cried just because I have a uterus, she called me an a**hole,” the post ended before asking if she should regret ignoring the crying baby.
After posting, many people took to the comments to express that there was nothing wrong with ignoring the crying child.
“The baby’s mom was there so what were they upset about? It’s not like there was an abandoned baby screaming alone on the floor, it was a fussy baby who had a parent with it and didn’t seem in distress,” one comment began.
“I’m a mother and hearing a baby cry doesn’t put me into a fit, or make my ‘heart ache’. Babies cry and they are judging you for no reason. Too bad because you sound like a very patient and understanding friend to sit and listen to them talk about themselves and babies and not even show interest in your life. Might be time to drift apart a bit from these two.”
Another commenter agreed, writing: “So because you ignored the crying baby and didn’t engage in a conversation about how sad you feel for the baby (who is probably just tired or hungry) you’re a heartless person who doesn’t deserve to be a mother? Get new friends.”
Many people also noted that they weren’t sure what the poster’s friends wanted her to do while hearing the crying.
“What were you supposed to do about someone else’s kid crying? A stranger’s baby needs should not cause you heartache, that’s absurd,” one person pointed out in the comments.